How I Found My Niche

Day 3 - Best Man or Better Man

40637_668597463392_5899018_n.jpg

“A lot of women grow up with the dream of getting married and having a child. I think Courtney hit the jackpot, because she is getting married to a child.” best man, wedding, niche movement, happiness, best friend, movement, job, love your job,

This is the way John Giannone started out his best man speech at my wedding in May 2010. See, John is that guy who is a child at heart, will bring laughter to any room, and can hold a conversation with the best of them. And, he likes to give his closest friends and family a bunch of shit (I mean that in the nicest way possible).

John Giannone (the best man) is great with family members and new friends, and creating genuine conversations. Years later, he still remembers all of our FDU & Rutgers friends and he has the personality where he can join into any group setting.

John Giannone (the business man) is intellectual, hard working, and smarter than I’ll ever be. He’s great with numbers, contracts, and relationship building.

Believe it or not, John and I go all the way back before pre-school where we both attended the same reading hour at Franklin Library. However, our friendship didn’t start there. About 7 to 8 years later, I was put on the Cardinals (Coach B’s) little league team with John. At that point, we became teammates. We attended separate grammar schools and didn’t start becoming friends until freshman year of high school. We played soccer, basketball and baseball together, and started to hang out with the same group of guys who we still hang out with to this day (Russ, Garry, Dave, and Scott).

So, why am I writing about one of my best friends? Not to get all mushy here, but there are a lot of traits I admire about John and he also indirectly played a huge role in my starting of the Niche Movement.

I see John as having a perfect balance of book smarts and street smarts. He holds a Mechanical Engineering degree from Rutgers University where he was president of his fraternity (Phi Tau) and recently earn an MBA at NYU’s Stern Business School while working full time. At the same time, he can think quick on his feet to offer the perfect punch line to any joke. All his joking aside, he truly cares about the people around him and the people he meets.

So how did John help influence the Niche Movement?

He was lucky enough to meet an amazing woman two years ago, now girlfriend, Benee Williams (also a Scarlet Knight alum). Courtney and I now are lucky to call her one of our friends as well, but she’s more than that. In October 2012 after a Rutgers football game, we all came back to our house where we sat around a fire pit. Everyone was in some way complaining about money and their job unfortunately. At that point, I spoke up and said “I love my job and get to make a difference in young adult’s lives everyday.”

After continuing on and on while some of our friends still didn't get what I did, I explained how my passion lies in not only helping college students thrive while they are in school, but thrive in their twenties after graduation. I hated seeing talented, hard-working and deserving students lives come to a screeching halt after graduation. It could be a boss they hated, or a work environment that didn’t “click.” Maybe it was a side project they put off, or a graduate program that they weren’t in to. And they didn’t know what to do. They were stuck.

That is when Benee exclaimed, “Kevin, you’re trying to help them find their niche!” And that is when the light bulb went off. The next morning I couldn’t stop thinking about what she said as I wrote and brainstormed. That Sunday evening, I purchased the domain TheNicheMovement.com. The rest, as they say, is history.

How they inspired me:

You know that saying “Surround yourself with great people…” well I am lucky to have John and Benee as close friends. John is one of the very few that I will bounce ideas of off, accomplishments, or new ventures in this journey with the Niche Movement and he never questions it by saying things like “what if.” He always responds with “That’s awesome, man. Let me know how I can help.” That is how they inspire me. To know that I have a huge support system to dive into the unknown.

What they taught me:

To live in the moment, relax and have fun.

#Nichetip

An idea or project you are working on can come together when you least expect it. Don’t be afraid to share your passion with others around you, you never know who will help you go onto the the next step.

Oh, by the way, here is what you’ve all been waiting for: Intro to John’s best man speech

 

Day 2 - Pushing Your Comfort Zone

216_519830832742_1945_n.jpg

marriage, happiness, movement, love your job, love my job, hate my job, married, wife, husband, fox hole, be happy, job, job search I remember it like it was yesterday. We were half way through our Spring semester - sophomore year and Courtney suggested I apply to become an orientation leader (she, of course, had already applied). At this time, we knew each other for a year and a half and only held the title of “boyfriend and girlfriend” for maybe 5 months.

My first reaction to her suggestion, “Oh, she just wants me to apply so we don’t have to be apart for the summer.” I still to this day believe that, but she had the inkling that a) I was qualified, b) it would change me for the better, and c) I would be a great role model for Fairleigh Dickinson’s incoming students. Well, I hate to admit it, but she was right.

Needless to say, Courtney, myself and 16 others (Ruben Henao, Dina Deleasa, Mike Sorbino, Michelle Rodriguez to name a few) went on to become FDU’s 2004 Orientation Leaders and boy, was it a summer that changed my life for the better. You’ll meet Ray, Nat, and Sarah later on in my #HowIFoundMyNiche series, but these group of individuals have had a huge impact on where I am today. Needless to say, applying and accepting to be an orientation leader is one of top 5 “leap of faith's” I have taken.

Anyway, back to Courtney. See, after 13 years (4 years of marriage) she still knows what's good for me even if I don’t see it. She knows how to motivate me, kick my ass when I need it, and pick me back up when I’m at the bottom. (Thank you for that.) Her work ethic has always amazed me and scared me at the same time. When she finds something she is passionate about, she goes all in and will do whatever it takes to get it done. And that’s what I love about being able to spend the rest of my life with her.

It’s like that Nascar drafting theory - the more ambitious either of us are, we always find a way to keep up, tailing right behind one another. When I see Courtney’s hard work pay off, I see the value of the hustle I’ve been putting in and know it will all be worth it sooner or later.

For those of you reading this that know Courtney, then you know the head she has on her shoulders. For those of you that don’t, then I suggest you connect with her ASAP. She has an uncanny ability to put others ahead of herself and go the extra mile.

I’m fortunate to have someone like her to bounce ideas off of and receive her help when I ask (and especially when I don’t ask).

How they inspired me:

If it’s not clear from the above, Courtney has made a huge impact on me. She provides light at the end of the tunnel, helps me solve a lot of problems in work and life, and always helps me see the optimistic side of things.

What they taught me:

Lately, Courtney has taught me I need to find the silver lining and be the most positive and proactive version of myself.

Overall, she has taught me not to give up on my dreams, big or small.

#Nichetip

What I’d like you to take away:

1. If someone you trust and that knows you well suggests you try something new or put yourself out there, listen to them and do it. Take that leap of faith. Push your comfort zone.

2. When you find that person you can be in the fox hole with day in and day out, don’t let them go and work hard as hell to keep them in your life.

Day 1 - Appreciating Your Parents

MomDadXmas86-1-of-1.jpg

As we get older, the more obvious it is that our parents played such an important role to shape us into the adults we are today. Lately, I have been counting my blessings on how lucky I am to have both my parents, Kevin and Mary, side by side, every step of my journey. As I reflect on who my parents truly are and what they value, it is crazy how much of their characteristics, values, and personalities have blended into who I am at 31 years old. My dad, Kevin, has been the hardest working, most caring man I know. He’s reserved, soft-spoken, and conservative. But just like me, when he speaks, people listen. My mom, Mary, on the other hand, is the life of the party, could talk a dog off a bone, and has the sharpest memory I’ve ever seen (this has it’s pro’s and con’s, believe me). Mom, I if you're reading this I mean that in the nicest way possible :)

parents, thank you, happiness, movement, new jersey, 90's kidI get my hard working, “help-everyone” attitude from my dad, but can put to use my mom’s outgoing personality to strike up conversations to network and connect people together. I’m most grateful that the memory gene has been passed onto me and it comes in handy while building relationships with everyone I meet.

I grew up a simple life. I am an only child, but lucky enough to have many cousins around, that at several times, felt like brothers and sisters. My parents never gave me more than I needed, but always seemed to make things work even if times were tight or something seemed out of reach. Perfect example: My senior year of high school in 2002, I had the opportunity to visit Wales and England because of an exchange program my golf coach set up every four years. I'm pretty confident no one in my family has traveled overseas and every way they could, they supported this once in a lifetime experience. I thank you both everyday for this.

Here’s a snapshot of how they’ve inspired me, what they taught me, and what you can take away.

How they inspired me: As I reflect to answer this question, I know they want me to be happy. I never had pressure to become “successful” or follow a family member’s footsteps. They allowed me to be who I wanted to be, but when I reached out for help, they are there.

What they taught me: They taught me that there’s always a way to “make it work.” Whether it relates to finances, marriage, family, or career you can find a way to solve the problem, move forward, and look to the bright side.

#NicheTip: What I'd like you to take away from this post is that there is someone out there that has or is going to someday shape your life.

1. Don’t take them for granted and let them know they influenced you.

2. Reflect on how they have inspired you and pass that onto others.

3. If you want something bad enough, find a way to “make it work.”

How I Found My Niche

slide.001.png

I can still remember when I was 7 years old...all I did was play with Legos and pipeworks. It wasn’t just the playing, it was the building and construction that I loved. Arriving at the finished product of the Lego toy pictured on the box came easy to me and my imagination was probably at it’s peak.

If you asked me what I wanted to do with the rest of my life I would have said an engineer or architect.

After picking up my first golf club, and subsequently falling in love with the game in 1998, I traded in Legos for drivers and putters.

If you were to ask me again in high school where my life was headed I would have said a “PGA Director of Golf.”

After being inspired by great teachers and coaches in high school, I went on to college. Early on in college, if you asked me what I would do in life, I would have said “teacher.”

Everyone’s had these moments or has been asked the question “what do you want to do when you grow up?”  (unfortunately, too many times). Well, I am letting you all know I don’t have that answer yet, but everyday since I launched the Niche Movement in January 2013, I feel closer to it.

In this journey, I have been very fortunate to have so many friends, relatives, and colleagues support my endeavor. Over the next 30 days, I am going to share who these people are and how they have helped me inch closer to finding my niche. This isn't going to be all about me, but truly it is a story of the heros and influencers in my life. This is about the people that inspired me, motivated me, picked me up when I was down, told me to take a risk or told me I was a leader.

Lastly, I plan on injecting as much personality, emotion and authenticity into my posts as these people at one time or another have been near and dear to my heart.

Enjoy, and thank you for reading.

#NicheTip: Take 15 minutes a week to reflect on those that are important in your life that have helped you get to where you are today and thank them.

Day 1 - Appreciating Your Parents

Day 2 - Pushing Your Comfort Zone

Day 3 - Best Man or Better Man

Day 4 - Let Your Talents do the Talking

Day 5 - The First Big Pivot: How a Conversation Changed the Trajectory of my Life

Day 6 - They Said I was Leader...Here's What Happened Next

Day 7 - The Ripple Effect

Day 8 - Office Crashers: When I asked for Help I got More Than I Imagined

Day 9 - The 2nd Pivot: A New Career Path & A Boss That Believe in Me 

Day 10 - Learning Relational Leadership

Day 11 - Take Time for the Most Important People Around You

Day 12 - Build Your Network Before You Need It

Day 13 - Taking Advantage of an Opportunity

Day 14 - What Can Happen When People Believe In Your Vision

Day 15 - How to Make the Most of Your Days

Day 16 - People Come Into Your Life for a Reason

Day 17 - Other Duties as Assigned: Not Always a Bad Thing

Day 18 - How I Learned to Get Things Done with Purpose & Personality

Day 19 - Life as You Climb: Creating Environments Where Everyone Can Thrive

Day 20 - Running Toward Your Passion

Day 21 - Putting Intentionality and Efforts Into Your Relationships

Day 22 - Activators vs. Cheerleaders: How To Find Action Oriented Supporters In Your Network

Day 23 - 3 Ways To Tell Your Story In A Noisy World

Day 24 - There Are No Gatekeepers

Day 25 -Could Twitter Lead You Onto The Set Of A Documentary? It Did For This Student

Day 26  - How A Movement Gaines Momentum After One Year

Day 27 - Sometimes It's More Dangerous To Be Cautious 

Day 28 - The Remarkable Story of Passion Project Turned Start Up

Day 29 - Silencing The Negativity To Unleash Greatness

Day 30 - I Found My Niche

Tell Us Your Story: Amma Marfo - Standing out as an Introvert

AmmaMarfo.5.14.14titlecard.001.jpg

introvert, the niche movement, leadership, career advice On Wednesday May 14th 7pm EST., The Niche Movement presents a live interview with Amma Marfo, the thoughtful yet incurably silly Assistant Director of Student Activities for Involvement and Assessment at Emmanuel College in Boston, MA. She is fiercely curious and extremely dedicated to fostering similar curiosity in her students and young people about finding a career path that suits their skills and talents.  We'll be talking about Standing Out as an Introvert, Amma's amazing blog posts and perhaps gluten-free baking!

 

Hosted by Kevin O'Connell, founder of the Niche Movement.

 Join the conversation...

Use #nichestory to participate in the Twitter convo, and if you have a question for Laura be sure to use #nichestory so we can ask it live on air!

@nichemovement

@ammamarfo @koco83