Day 14 - What Can Happen When People Believe in Your Vision

During my first few years, fellow student affairs colleagues described the feeling:  seeing your closet student leaders graduate college. I didn’t know what that felt like because I was only at Centenary just shy of two years. It wasn’t until May 2010 when that feeling hit when one of our student leaders Dana Wise graduated from Rutgers.  I would now describe it as joy, happiness, and even some sadness (especially when they don’t return in August).

Let me explain how I got to this moment:

When I started at Rutgers, one of my main initiatives was to create and expand the community out of the Livingston Recreation Center. Sure, it was easy to promote intramurals, recruit refs, and lead the 8-10 student directors that got paid to work for our department. The real challenge (even though it didn’t feel like it) was too create a volunteer advisory council. Week in and week out I observed the staff that worked in the building from front desk to fitness assistants to intramural officials to see what students would be the best to start this council. I slowly started observing a few students, Dana Wise, Carlos Correa, and Tara Curran to be exact, because they loved being around our recreation center (aka Livi Rec).

I started up conversations to find out more about them, slowly work in what I was trying to start and see if they would buy-in. The easiest sell was Dana because we found out we both grew up in the same part of NJ - in Sussex County. As weeks went on, Dana, Tara, and Carlos started to help me build this community even though they didn’t work directly for me. They saw my vision, they cared about the other students, and were ready to make a difference.

Late Tuesday night meetings turned into programming on the weekends for the Livingston community. Our most successful event was a 3 on 3 charity basketball tournament that raised hundreds of dollars for Rutgers Against Hunger. That’s where the real community was built and where Dana stepped up as a leader. Not only did we have 32+ basketball teams, we partnered with residence life, recruited and managed 20 volunteers, and she made sure all necessary sponsorships were secured.

Leading up to graduation, Dana was a psychology major and had established a very nice resume by building a set of leadership skills for herself and becoming president of our council. So much so, that she started to have reservations about “going into” the psychology field. Of course after some long conversations, some tears, and some confidence boosting, she decided to pursue a Graduate Assistantship and attended the NIRSA national conference in the spring of 2010.

Dana did everything she was supposed to do - had a strong resume, great GPA, dressed professionally, interviewed well, and had a personal touch. However, she came home empty handed - no assistantship and no admittance into a graduate program.

She did do something right - before she boarded the plane to the conference she struck up a conversation with someone wearing a Cornell sweatshirt. That person was headed to the conference and helped put her in touch with someone from Old Dominion and while she was at the conference she secured an interview for the facilities position.

Even though she came up short, she made an impression just like I did when I interviewed at Rutgers. April came and went. So did May. She graduated thinking “the world was about to end” because she didn’t have anything lined up. After some more tears in my office, I told to keep her head up, keep networking and something will come. Sure enough, a week after graduation, she interviewed and landed a job as the marketing GA at Old Dominion from a connection she made at the conference.

Talk about about timing and waiting for the right opportunity. This just didn’t turn out to be a graduate assistantship.

Let me really break down what came from this:

- Dana was able to help out on one of the outdoor adventure trips and travel to Peru.

- She was accepted to travel to China as part of a student affairs exchange program.

- From the exchange program she met the Old Dominion’s president’s wife and basically became besties with the family where she spent Easter with them.

- Lastly, her director was the upcoming NIRSA president which would open up a ton of doors.

Plus, she lived 10 minutes from Virginia Beach while earning a masters degree. Not a bad deal while building her personal brand even more above what she accomplished at Rutgers.

All of the hard work and emotions of “finding your niche” started to pay off. I knew Dana was going to become a great professional regardless of the field she entered, so I invited her to present with me a second time at the Region 1 Student Lead-on at Syracuse University. This time it wasn’t about group dynamics or leadership, it was about standing out, remaining patient, and to take advantage of every opportunity that is put in front of you.

Now with a masters degree in hand, several life experiences later and becoming a responsible, independent adult, Dana is the Membership & Marketing Director for the YMCA in Wayne Hills - the largest YMCA in the state.

What they taught me:

First of all, Dana taught me that hard work does pay off. Even though her story has a few bumps in the road, she kept pushing herself. I also learned that my advice, mentoring, and in reality, counseling, was helping. Not just Dana, but a several others. This is why I want to use my skills of connecting, finding one's passion, and helping them standout; and spread it as far as it can go.

How they inspired me:

This council I was charged to build was volunteer on my part and the students part. This has been one of the most rewarding initiatives of my career at Rutgers. Dana, Tara, and Carlos are now some of my best friends I see regularly. They saw my vision, believed in me, and wanted to make a difference. They all made a difference not only for the community, but to me as I try to grow out my next vision.

#Nichetip:

When an opportunity is put in front of you, take it, trust it, and give it all you have.

Day 13 - Taking Advantage of an Opportunity

I started at Rutgers in August 2008 and I thought I would be a small fish in a big pond. However, like I mentioned in my post yesterday, my boss Paul Fischbach did a great job of helping me network and meet co-workers outside of our department. Coincidentally, it also helped that Courtney started working in Student Life a month prior. I took every opportunity to grow my network and enhance my professional development by attending workshops and events to meet other student affairs colleagues.

A few months into my new job, I met Avani Rana who was in charge of the student leadership for Student Life. I had shared my leadership background and the initiatives I helped create at Centenary College and we quickly connected to see how I could help her out and represent our department. That spring semester Avani invited me to sit on the Rising Leaders committee and I was able to offer a module on communication during the 13-week program for first year students.

This was not only a great avenue to meet new students and represent the Recreation department, but this also fulfilled my desire to present and engage students in leadership. A year later, I remained on the Rising Leaders committee with other deans and student affairs colleagues and Avani recruited me to help out with their weekend retreat in January. Over the next few semesters I was given the opportunity to help with retreats, present workshops on group dynamics, communication, and public speaking.

Avani also planned a leadership conference every March and recruited me to present in 2009 and 2010. However, in 2010 I decided to invite one of our student leaders, Dana Wise, to co-present with me to give her practice speaking in front of her peers. We ran a workshop for other students leaders on group dynamics and being a leader even if you’re not in a leadership position.

Remember that post I wrote about attending my first NIRSA conference? Well, I stayed involved with NIRSA and became the State Director in 2011. As the representative for NIRSA I sat on various committees and helped plan the student lead-on for Region 1 at Syracuse University. Not only was this a “pay-it-forward” type of act, but I truly wanted to help students and connect them with the right professionals just like Jess Ward did for me. That’s how professional development works, you get involved as a new professional, start to carve out your niche, and then you help others find their niche.

Every year since I started at Rutgers, I had the pleasure of working with great students that were thriving in their roles with recreation, in student leadership, and NIRSA. There was something I started to observe. I started to notice that these great students were thriving in college and then after graduation, many of them struggled with being fulfilled and happy in their new post-graduation lives.

The conversations of “I think I chose the wrong major” and “I shouldn’t have decided to enroll in this masters program” or “I am bored with my job” was far too common. I would put the counselor/therapy hat back on and point them in the right direction.

Ultimately, it was these 3-4 years, that my calling to help students stand-out and give them “real-world” skills to succeed after graduation, started to become more and more important to my ‘why’ (why meaning, why I got up every morning). This was especially true when it came to pointing them in the direction to a more fulfilled life.

My initial conversations with Avani and ultimately that connection led to a realization that I could engage an audience of 50-100+ students. I was inching closer and closer to finding my niche.

What they taught me:

At the time I started at Rutgers, I was a bit nervous to be working at such a large institution. However, I learned how important outreach and exposure can be. Between the help of networking from my boss, Paul, and Avani continually inviting me to help out, I quickly established a name for myself based on my talents and skills.

How they inspire me:

The moments I have been able to run workshops, facilitate team buildings at retreats, and present to large groups has been invaluable to my work with the Niche Movement. Avani is one of many colleagues that valued the opportunity to give more people the chance to present and interact with other colleagues. This inspires me to ensure that I pay it forward and provide opportunities for young professionals to present to my students.

#Nichetip:

Early on in your career, take advantage of the committees or workgroups available for you to participate in, especially if you are passionate about it. At times it may feel like extra work, but in the long run it just may bring you closer to finding your niche.

Day 10- Learning Relational Leadership

As I mentioned in day nine’s post, I switched directions and instead of using my marketing degree and going into corporate, I started  working at Centenary College in August of 2006. The job at Centenary gave me the opportunity to build their campus recreation program from the ground up, develop student leadership initiatives, build a network of other student affairs professionals and work with incredible college students. In addition, this job allowed me to go back to school and earn a masters. Now, I didn’t jump right into a masters program - partly because I only started working there in August and it was difficult to enroll and be accepted that fall. Luckily, this timing allowed me some time to determine if I wanted to get an MBA or a Masters Degree in Education. In all honesty, I needed a few more months to clear my head of four straight years of college classes.

By that October though I started finalizing my options because a few of my colleagues, including my boss Kristen McKitish, recommended an amazing program to earn a masters in Leadership and Public Administration. She said the professors were some of the best professors she ever had and she had applied a lot of what she learned everyday. I applied, was accepted and signed up for my first class - Advanced Written Communication. This course was taught by Jeff Carter. It was a requirement in the program because of intensive writing required in order to successfully complete the program (when I completed the degree I had a portfolio of my papers from the ten classes in a four inch binder).

Jeff Carter was by far one of the best professors in the program. He was down to earth, treated us like adults and was one of the most efficient and well-prepared professors I ever had. I succeeded in the next 9 classes because of the discipline and attention to detail he instilled on the class. Our very first class he told us we would be writing a 20-30 page paper which I thought was a daunting task. However, he taught us how to research, how to write accurately in APA style, and chunk your writing instead of waiting until the last minute.

In addition to Jeff’s teaching skills, he captured my attention every class for each of the three courses I took with him. He was a retired police captain and was attaining his doctorate degree where he was doing a dissertation on Toxic Leadership. He matched the style of Ann Huser and Hart Singh, two of my favorite FDU professors, because he brought real-world examples into every classes.

What they taught me:

A lot of what Jeff Carter taught me has framed my leadership style: relational leadership. He was one of the main reasons I succeeded when it came to writing and presenting in each class as well as creating an engaging environment that made me want to go to every single class.

How they inspired me:

In a professional setting, Jeff has influenced me to be the best leader I can and provide the resources for those around me. In an academic setting, I strive to be a professor one day. His presentation style and ability to engage with his audience has spilled over into my presentation style.

#NicheTip:

When you are in a position of leadership, don't stand on a pedestal. People want to connect and relate to you, so give them stories and open yourself up to be able to do that.

Learning to write and present is so important for someone that is carving out their niche. Look for any opportunity to fine tune those skills. This will ensure that when you have figured out what your message is to the world, that you have the skills to share that message.

Day 7 - The Ripple Effect: A Friend’s Journey Impacted Hundreds of Lives

On my day 1 post about Appreciating Your Parents, I mentioned that I am an only child. Several times growing up I was fortunate to have my cousins (Denise, Stacy, Kim, Jenny, Ricky, and Jason) treat me like their little brother. In turn, I looked to all of them like my older brothers and sisters. I even had Ricky and Jason in my wedding party, and Courtney and I turn to my cousin Jen for life advice all the time. It’s been great having my cousins around, but as we get older it is tough to stay in touch and see each other frequently.

That’s where one of my best friends, Russ Bloodgood, enters my “How I Found My Niche” series.

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Just like my friend John, I met Russ through sports and we became great friends in high school playing on the golf team. We traveled to Wales together our senior year, have held the same group of friends since high school, and both hold masters degrees. We have something else in common as well and it’s very unique. See, Russ is always helping others, has very strong ties to his family, and is a very hard worker.

Throughout college - Russ at Villanova, myself at FDU - we would visit each other almost once a month and get our group of friends together every break. However, our junior year, Russ said he wouldn’t be home because he was going on a trip. This wasn’t just any trip - he was dedicating his break from school to travel to Las Vegas, New Mexico to volunteer with 14 other Nova students as part of Habitat for Humanity (yes, there’s a city named Las Vegas in New Mexico) .

When Russ returned, I could see he had grown, just like I did after my summer as an orientation leader.  He told me about the new group of friends he made, the big picture perspective he now had on life, and the difference he made in the community. I was hooked and had to learn more.

Returning to school that Fall semester I immediately asked around to see if there was a trip like this that existed or if a Habitat for Humanity club was established. At the time, I turned to Sarah Azavedo and Michelle Luff, FDU’s new Assistant Director of Student Life. I said to them “my buddy Russ went on this trip, he’s now leading another one and FDU needs something like this.”

It turns out, Russ has inspired and influenced me more than anyone knows (including him). He wound up going on 3 other trips and leading one as an alumni. However, Russ made a bigger impact: he inspired me to start an alternative breaks program at FDU where we went to Opelika, AL in ‘06 and Grand Rapids, MI in ‘07.

Russ indirectly changed at least 50 people’s lives.

At Centenary College, I volunteered to help out with their Hurricane Katrina Relief trips to NOLA in ‘07 and ‘08. I contributed a lot of what Russ shared with me on those trips.

Russ indirectly changed at least 250 people lives.

At Rutgers, I served as Habitat for Humanity’s staff advisor for a year and half and again shared several pieces of advice and knowledge that Russ passed down to me. This helped more than ever because they run four trips a year. In addition, they are also raising $100,000 to build and dedicate their own house to a family in Plainfield, NJ.

Again, Russ indirectly changed 50-100 Rutgers Habitat for Humanity members and is helping another family get into a house.

What they taught me:

At the time, while we were in college, it was comforting to see one of my best friends going on this journey of experiencing college “outside the classroom.” Overall, Russ has taught me to always lend a hand and help those who need it.

#NicheTip:

You never know how far your actions can travel and who they can influence.

For People Who Battle Procrastination: Use It Wisely

There are no limits to what you can accomplish when you are supposed to be doing something else.

Tomorrow (noun) – a mystical land where 99% of all human productivity, motivation and achievement is stored.

Going to start studying at 3:00 p.m…. 3:05 p.m.: Missed it…4:00 p.m. it is.

 Due tomorrow? Do tomorrow.

Procrastination. Ah, yes, we’ve all been there: seven hours before the 8:00 a.m. due date of a 12-15 page paper that was casually started yesterday….night…while watching New Girl. Basically, the only content on the page is:

Name

Professor

Course Title

Date

Title

In a handful of unique situations, procrastination may lead to successful completion of a task or project. Some research even says occasional procrastination isn’t all that bad. After all, procrastination is really just a matter of prioritizing and time management. However, whether it’s with chores, college assignments or work tasks, procrastination can be a significant hindrance in one’s reliability and performance. Habitual procrastinators are simply living through life’s experiences. Getting by. Surviving through it and hurriedly moving on to the next task.

Where’s the opportunity for creativity? Where’s the opportunity to evaluate?

Allotting the appropriate amount of time to accomplish a goal opens a gateway for creativity. More time to complete the basic criteria gives one the chance to take a second, maybe third, look at the finished product while considering alternative and creative ways to express the ultimate point. Going that extra mile can sometimes be the difference between a B+ and an A from a professor, or the difference between “Thanks” and “This is great work, thank you!” from a supervisor. For example, getting a head start on the job search will give you the time and patience you need to obtain a job that’s a right fit for you. Starting in advance means you have more time to network with potential connections, more time to search postings and company profiles and more time to explore the various opportunities and avenues available to you such as unconventional job search strategies.

Getting started on a project early also gives one the chance to edit and reconsider aspects of the work once the first draft or version is complete. Hurriedly sending an email to a job recruiter before the job application closes at midnight can lead to grammatical errors, incorrect information, and that embarrassing second email, “whoops, I forgot the attachment.” Now that’s an unfortunate first impression.

On the other hand, taking the time to sit down and craft an email that is clear, concise and correct can lead to tremendous opportunities. Starting ahead means that errors and contradicting points that would, perhaps, go unnoticed are realized and corrected before another set of eyes take a look.

Procrastination and the Job Search

A great example would be the infamous cover letter. If you’ve procrastinated submitting your credentials for a posting, chances are you’ll be submitting a classic, mundane cover letter complete with all the necessary points…the boring, inorganic necessary points. This will not wow a recruiter. In fact, the recruiter, who reads hundreds of cover letters, will immediately realize your disregard to crafting an authentic and unique cover letter specific to the company and, more importantly, the position. Taking the time to prepare a genuine cover letter shows care and interest.

An opportunity to review and evaluate the task in its final stages will show a professor or supervisor that the work was not done simply to check it off the list. It was a priority and that dedication should not go unnoticed. Evaluation provides details and avenues for improvement on future work, too, allowing one to grow and develop as a student or professional.

Procrastination can become a bad habit which can significantly affect the daily routine and attitude of a person. Once one task has been procrastinated, chances are many other important and sometimes time-sensitive priorities will follow suit. Habitual procrastination can become an unhealthy lifestyle and you won’t even realize what you’re missing. Procrastination means spending more money on vacations, taxes and other things. It means staying late at work to finish a project instead of going to happy hour with your buddies.

A popular phrase says, “A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.” Oh but it does. One person’s procrastination could seriously impact the way another person’s job or team assignment functions and then it becomes this huge, sour snowball effect full of irritated coworkers, annoyed supervisors and potentially negative reviews of the final work.

I won't sit here and pretend that I don't procrastinate because that could not be further from the truth. It is an exhilarating feeling working under pressure, under a deadline. That's the journalist in me. I will say, though, that  the key with procrastination is to use it productively. Consider the reason for procrastinating a task:

1. I don’t feel like doing it.
2. I have other things to do.
3. It won’t be that difficult.
4. It isn’t really time sensitive.

Consider who your procrastination might affect:

1. My boss.

2. My family/friends.

3. My teammates.

Then, evaluate and determine whether it is beneficial to put off the task. If it actually can wait, while allowing the opportunity and time for at least an evaluation before submission, then by all means, go on a Netflix binge of New Girl. Otherwise, do something today, right now even, that your future self will thank you for.