How Crossfit Helped Me Launch A Kickstarter Campaign

Consistency. It’s one of the hardest things for me when it comes to working out and I’m sure I’m not the only one. Throughout college I would go in spurts where I would workout with my roommates but none of us really had any idea what were doing in the gym. Sure, the saying “it’s leg day, bro” would be thrown around but did we really know the proper form, let alone the appropriate weight and rep scheme? Hell, no! Since graduating college and hitting the real world, I have been fortunate enough to work at different colleges and had free access to recreation centers. In fact, for the last six years my office has been no more than 10 feet from a fitness center. I found working out as a painstaking chore. I know that working out 3-4 times a week is good for you. While I’ve seen results, I have never been able to stick with it for more than a few weeks at a time. Until now!

On June 5th, I joined Endorphin Crossfit in Middlesex, NJ.

It just so happens that was the same day I released my first blog post in my 30 day “Find Your Niche” series for The Niche Movement.

Two full months later sticking with crossfit at least 3 (sometimes 4) times a week, I have seen some crazy correlations between positive gains in the gym and in my life. This summer was filled with early mornings and late nights of writing, networking, brainstorming, and executing new projects to get to where I am on my final day of my Kickstarter campaign.

If you are a busy person that has battled with consistency in the gym while leading a busy life then these three tips can help - especially as summer comes to an end.

1. Mastery

I have taken my share of classes and tried various routines over the last eight years. However, I have noticed that when you take a class like spin or workout (or go running) by yourself, it requires A LOT of self-discipline. At Endorphin, from my first class to now, there has been a detailed plan everyday. You are held accountable not by only by the amazing coaches, but by your peers in your class. Everyone is giving it their all, reaching for their next PR, or trying something new for the very first time like me. Every crossfit class helps me strive to master a new lift, technique, or physically test my endurance to my body in ways I haven’t been pushed since being a high school athlete.

Since I decided to turn my blogging series for The Niche Movement into a book to end employment unhappiness for this generation, I went down roads I thought I would never travel. There were weekends I spent filming my Kickstarter video, mornings pitching and interviewing press, and late nights emailing friends, family, and people in my network for contributions. I kept to a detailed plan. Supporters around my campaign held me accountable. And I reached several “PR’s” like being featured in Buzzfeed, Money Under 30, and breaking my goal of $3,000 in less than 29 days.

#NicheTip: Mastery driven motivation works. Find a workout routine that will get you excited to achieve new levels of fitness.

2. Momentum

When I lose interest in working out and my routine becomes boring (like it does several times in the winter) I become lazy, unmotivated and procrastination settles in for my personal life.

Within two weeks, Endorphin’s coaches helped me find my one rep max for various lifts like back squat, bench press, and deadlift. Once I had my strength training plan and started seeing progress, I was hooked. I had momentum and enthusiasm to keep to a regular routine this summer. My days consisted of waking up early and putting in almost two hours of work before I left for my full time job. Then, after working a full day, I went straight to Endorphin at 5:15 where crossfit gave me a boost to come home and eat a healthy meal with Courtney and spend the evenings working on The Niche Movement.

#NicheTip: Ya know the commercial that says, “a body in motion, stays in motion”? It’s true. Try not to leave too much time between leaving work and going to the gym. It’s during that lag time that we find other things we need to do and talk ourselves out of working out that day.

3. Clarity

Outside of physical benefits, crossfit has made me more energized, reduced stress and provide much needed clarity for my mind. When I go to crossfit, Bonnie and Ian (the founders of Endorphin), always reiterate to focus on every part of your body throughout your reps. I love this because every rep and WOD has me completely in the moment. There certainly have been ups and downs over the last 90 days of this adventure trying to launch my business full time but when I am at crossfit my mind and body are in the present. I have never thought about my full time job, The Niche Movement, what’s for dinner or other issues in my life.

Anyone that does crossfit, knows how much energy you put into every WOD. Even though I leave there wiped after every class, my head has been completely clear and ready to attack the next item on my to-do list.

#Nichetip: The mind needs breaks in the workday, and just in the day in general, to reset. When you workout you only have room to focus on the workout and can’t let your mind run about your to-do lists. A clear head is a much more creative and powerful head than one that is constantly running.

During the last two months, I have been very lucky to find a box that cares about personal development, proper weight lifting technique and building a community. Lately, I have pushed myself in ways I never thought I could and crossfit has certainly helped achieve some amazing personal goals both in the gym and with The Niche Movement.

See What Sticks: Curiosity, Critics and Creativity

Hi everyone, Amma Marfo here. Two quick things about me that you’ll need to know before we begin:

(1) I am a reader. I am a library-loving, constant tome-carrying, unapologetic bibliophile. (2) If there’s anyone you will meet who can connect what she’s reading to the world around her, it’s me.

As such, I want to dedicate my time in this space to sharing with you what I’m reading, and how it could inform a budding professional’s daily life. 

While I am a devoted fan of the longform written word, there's another medium on which I do a lot of reading: Twitter. 140 character bursts of content have given me quite a bit: helped me connect with new friends and old, find exciting new sources of inspiration and development, and even find this opportunity to write for you all! But one of my favorite uses of Twitter has been the means to connect with people you may never get to talk to otherwise. This can be particularly exciting for bibliophiles such as myself, who can use it to connect with authors. I still remember the rush I got when I first connected with Judy Blume, author of the first chapter book I ever read on my own- Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing. I still get butterflies thinking about it :)

Most recently, I've been using Twitter to connect with Paul Jarvis, a web designer and writer who has a fantastic blog on Medium as well as his own website. As he approached the release of his new book, The Good Creative, I felt compelled to reach out and see if he'd be willing to share his thoughts about the book, his creative process, and how it could inform my profession. Luckily, he's a legit human and graciously accepted. I got to talk to him a little bit more about some of the eighteen habits he shares in his book as key to doing creative work. Even though my day job might not always be seen as a place that appreciates creativity, Paul's helping me see how I can disrupt my day-to-day; hopefully, it will do the same for you!

Habit: Trying and failing repeatedly. Paul's a tremendous believer in creating space to try and fail repeatedly toward the achievement of any goal. As someone who learned his craft of web design through experimentation, he literally had to fail many times before he succeeded. But trying and failing repeatedly, in his opinion, gives you a lot. It gives you the opportunity to find your voice, to get input from others on what your talents are, and can help you develop a thick skin and resilient attitude that makes sharing your craft with others easier. Paul is particularly passionate about this final element of the process. A related habit that he discusses is sharing your ugly process. By that, he means that you should do your best to share the journey that takes you to your final product. When we spoke more about this, he said:

Unless people are taught what goes into making something, they might not value it as much, so I like to share how I go from A to B with the work, so people get the inside story. You appreciate the band more when you watch [Behind the Music] those, and they’re interesting too- when someone who’s not a musician sees what goes into making an album or doing a tour [...] you appreciate it more deeply.

It can be easy to assume that the final product that someone else creates was effortless. But by allowing ourselves to experience the feeling of trying and failing repeatedly, and sharing those triumphs and struggles with others, we gain perspective on what it takes to get to that final product that people so revere.

Habit: Hug your critics. With that said, not everyone is going to be a fan of the final product. Some people are just haters. But Paul pushes back against this principle, encouraging people to hug their critics. Paul works under the concept of producing for your rat people. As a proud rat owner, he recognizes that lots of people don't care for rats- they're afraid of them, they think they're gross, they don't understand their appeal. But those who like rats, really like rats. They photograph them, they take care of them, they dedicate websites and message boards to them. He doesn't converse with those who don't get rats, about rats. He talks to the people who get it.

But, part of Paul's livelihood depends on being able to write for people who aren't his rat people. What do you do then? Part of doing effective work that can serve you financially is being able to adapt your work for a larger and more viable audience:

As long as my message is still the same and intact, and what I’m trying to say sounds like me, then it’s okay. Adapting your art is fine, as long as it stays true to you and the original message is intact.

As we chatted further, he shared that he pitches ideas to clients with their priorities in mind. Sometimes the ideas are outside of the box that these individuals travel in, other times they're more in line with their traditional strategy. But showing an understanding of what his clients (and occasional critics) are looking for, what they value, has helped him sustain relationships that don't always come so naturally. There can be a balance between serving your friends and the people who get you, and finding ways to serve those that may struggle to do so. Paul's book gives lots of advice on how to do just this.

Habit: Focus on the process, not the outcome. I'm sure we all know someone from classes or our major who was obsessed with the endgame. Getting famous. Getting an A. Building a resume. And these types of goals can be easy to focus on, even though there are other valuable things we can get from an experience (relationships, skills, exposure to new ideas). I asked Paul what his advice is for staying focused on the values that are inherent in the process. His advice?

I think a lot of it comes down to the ‘why’ there. Focusing on the process is important because it forces you to be present. If you want to get an ‘A’ in school or you want to get a degree, those are sort of intangible at the time. Being present with your intention is moving you toward that outcome.

Paul actually alludes to this principle on one of his other projects, a new podcast called Invisible Office Hours. He talks about his typical morning routine and how it helps prepare him for the day. By doing one task at a time- making and drinking his morning coffee, writing, spending time on social media- he is aware of the value that each task gives him. He speaks similarly about how he added writing as a sort of day job: he kept the revenue streams and time for web design and writing separate. He could see how each made him feel, what each gave him, and what he enjoyed about each. By making time to focus on the task at hand, taking inventory of what we get from these tasks and how we can be better, the seeming end motivation (such as salary or recognition) matters a little less.

The Good Creative is a wonderful read that can help anyone at all do better work. It doesn't have to be what we all tend to think of as creative work; Paul says "it’s taking an idea, turning it into something tangible (and marketable, if that’s the direction you want to go)." If this sounds like you, Paul's book is one for you. 

Day 27 - Sometimes It's More Dangerous To Be Cautious

When it comes to young people doing what they love we often send mixed messages that can be confusing. On one hand we have our commencement speakers and graduation cards filled with inspirational messages telling young people to go after their dreams. Yet on the other hand, when the graduation bash is over and reality has set in, we tell young people to do whatever they can to get a job. We are trying to be helpful, but we nudge them towards the first employer that offers a paycheck and job security. This is a problem. Young people have the best possible environment and circumstances (most of the time) to take risks, big risks! Someone in my life that has always lived life to the fullest and is living proof that taking risks can end well, is my friend Nina Duong.

Nina grew up in Texas, and attended University of North Texas. When she enrolled in college she also enlisted in the army as a means to pay for college. Her college experience included all the great times in and out of the classroom like many other students, but it also included a tour of duty in Iraq. When she returned from Iraq she took on more responsibility in the residence life department in a new position they created for her. She loved her experience as a student leader and had incredible mentors at UNT, and so she decided she would go into Student Affairs. Which sets us up for Nina’s first (of many) leaps of faith.

Nina had been doing a lot of research on graduate schools and had a list of about 4 schools that she was going to apply to. On the day she needed to submit her list of schools to receive her GRE test scores, she says she vividly remembers working in the residence life office that day. She received 3 different calls from either students or parents from NJ. She took it as a sign, looked up which student affairs grad program was in NJ, saw Rutgers had a program and added it as her 5^th and final choice on her list.

Nina is pretty amazing so, many graduate programs were recruiting her. When she came to Rutgers she interviewed for a graduate position with my wife Courtney. The position was brand new, so Nina had to decide on the position based solely on the interview and a belief that this would work out. After falling in love with the faculty, and an instant connection with Courtney she took another leap of faith. She turned down some pretty killer offers at other programs and packed her bags for New Jersey!

When Nina arrived, Courtney convinced her to play on the softball team. I can still remember the first game of the summer before Nina arrived at the field Courtney was telling me and some friends, “I invited my new grad to play. She says she is terrible at softball but she is an Iraqi war veteran how could she possibly be bad at softball?” Nina was AWFUL at softball, but she brought the same excitement and enthusiasm that she brought with her to New Jersey onto the softball field. She came to every game, gave it all she got, and when our team made it to the championship she gave one of the best pep talks I have ever heard in my entire life.

Nina could have easily said, “why would I apply to Rutgers, I know nothing about that program?” Or, “why would I take a new position in a brand new grad program when I can go into an existing position at a grad program with a long standing tradition?” Or, “why would I play softball if I am terrible?!” But, Nina doesn’t second-guess things, she just goes for it.

The best example of this has come to fruition in the last year since she graduated from her masters program. When Nina graduated she had one of the best resumes of any grad looking for jobs that same year. She had residence life experience, leadership and training experience, she is a veteran, and she had experience with the multicultural offices on campus. Her resume was incredible, perhaps better than some folks that have been in the field a few years. Much like she was in high demand for graduate programs, Nina could have easily had her pick of jobs when she graduated with her masters in student affairs. But, Nina had a big idea and she had to go after it. After one night out with her friends Nina came up with an ingenious idea for packaging cosmetics. I am no expert in this area, but Courtney and her mom tell me it’s a really good idea. One of those, “why didn’t I think of that?!” type of ideas. Nina also possessed an entrepreneurial spirit and felt like if she was going to make this idea happen she had to do it now. First, she took some of the money she earned from her service in the war and traveled the world. She knew these experiences would help to not only clear her head and prepare her for this new entrepreneurial endeavor, but again she thought, “when else will I have the opportunity to travel like this?” When she returned she got right to work on her idea. She now works part-time for Apple as a means to pay the bills, but spends the rest of her time working on her new business idea.

Nina can always dust off her student affairs resume. There are folks that would love to have Nina join their team, and if/when she’s ready to work in higher education they will be lined up with opportunities for her. But, Nina is young, and so she is using her twenties to travel, learn more about herself and the world, and she’s taking the plunge on a bright idea.

What they have taught me:

Nina has taught me to trust my gut. She has this unbreakable belief that things happen for a reason. She has taught me to find the silver lining in things and to take more risks. She also serves as an amazing example when I am working with young professionals that need to hear it’s ok to take risks. I will often tell them about Nina as a way to encourage them to push outside their comfort zone and find something they love to do.

How they have inspired me:

I can’t spoil the ending just yet, but let’s just say that day 30 I will be announcing some big news for The Niche Movement. Nina has inspired me to take big leaps of faith and trust the process. If you are a good person and you work hard, you will come out the other end ok. The ride may be a little bumpy and may take some twists and turns you don’t anticipate, but at the end of the day you will make it. When I think of Nina I am reminded of this, and I can’t help but be inspired to do what I love.

#NicheTip:

Take risks. You are only young once in your life. When you have a mortgage and a family and more bills to pay it becomes harder and harder to take risks. Trust your gut, and go for the job that fulfills you and not just your bank account. You will gain incredible insight, perspective and life experiences from the risks you take in your twenties and thirties that will set you up for success later in life. Remember this, sometimes it is more dangerous to be cautious. Not all career paths look alike. Look at Nina’s path, it’s completely unconventional. Maybe you’re first step is doing some volunteering or working abroad. Look for a variety of different opportunities, not just the ones on your university’s career search site. And if you need a good pep talk, send Nina a tweet her handle is @sillybanina.

Day 24 - There Are No Gatekeepers

 

I remember this day vividly - Wednesday, March 27th, 2013. I was sitting in my office at work when my phone rang. It was a non-Rutgers number that I didn’t recognize.

I answered it on the second ring. When I answered, the young man introduced himself, saying he was given my name by a former FDU friend of mine, Joe Paris, who now works in admissions at Temple University. The gentleman on the other end went on to say how we was looking to enroll in graduate programs and when he visited Temple that morning, he met Joe. While visiting Temple, Joe told him that he was unsure if this was the right program for him and he was still unsure of his career path.

That’s when Joe told him to connect with me. Well, this young man, Shyam Bhoraniya, got on his phone and started finding ways to get in touch with me. When Shyam explained this story to me on the phone, I was super impressed by his ambition. He took the initiative to not only immediately look up who I was, he searched for a phone number to make a personal connection. Shyam had such a great story and personality that he convinced me to meet him that same evening for coffee since he was going to be on campus.

While we talked face to face, I could see the passion in his eyes to make a difference in the world. Shyam shared stories of how he traveled to India to help young children, what he wanted to accomplish in the field of social work, and how he was working to motivate others. I then shared my vision to end employment unhappiness for college students and some projects I was working on with The Niche Movement. My vision resonated with Shyam and he wanted to help out in anyway.

As I drove home that evening from the initial introduction with Shyam, I knew that there was a reason I picked up the phone earlier that day. Meeting Shyam, led to so many other opportunities for the both of us.

A week later, Shyam and I spoke and I mentioned what I was doing with the 6 week Niche Movement cohort and I told him that the last week was focused on motivation and following your passion. On the side, Shyam was working on a passion project called Motivate My Day, a daily newsletter and social media account to inspire others. I knew his experience and the skill set he had in his early-twenties would add value to the students in this program. I invited him to do an online guest lecture on motivation as well as how to get through the “gatekeepers.”

Gatekeepers, in the world of job hunting or launching an initiative, are the people or things that control access to something or someone getting noticed. In Shyam’s world, there are no gatekeepers.

Later in the spring of 2013, Courtney and I came across WOW Talks, a community of people (started in London) that love what they do and are given a platform to share their passion from a variety of disciplines (10 min or less TED style talks & more informal). We found out that there was going to be the first WOW Talks held in the United States in New York City that May, so we bought tickets to attend. About a week out from the event, Shyam and I were talking and I told him about this event. By coincidence, he said he was attending the same event.

Shyam using his skills to connect with anyone, was already in touch with the founder, Gal Stiglitz. That night, Shyam helped anyway he could with the event and introduced us to Gal and several of the speakers. Throughout the summer of 2013, Shyam and I stayed in touch and we continued to talk about the WOW Talks. He knew that an event like this could succeed in the Rutgers/New Brunswick area and benefit college students. With some networking and ambition, Shyam partnered with Stephanie Cywnar, graduate student for the Student Life leadership office, to get the ball rolling on planning an event.

A few months later with the hard work of Shyam and Stephanie, they launched a WOW Talks event in November 2013 revolving around the theme of Education and Start-Ups. Because the theme connected with my efforts with helping young adults find their niche, I was invited to be one of the featured speakers and deliver a 10 minute speech. I have been very grateful for this opportunity to share my message with another 100+ students and help them connect the dots for their future.

Since November, Shyam and I have stayed in touch, periodically updating each other about one another’s endeavors and accomplishments. Today, as luck would have it, on the day I am featuring him, the two of us finally caught up and had lunch. We hadn’t seen each other in four months and one hour wasn’t enough to re-connect. However, I learned that Shyam is now going to be helping WOW Talks as their North America Events Coordinator to help spread them throughout the United States.

What They Taught Me:

There are very few people in my network that are as great at getting through the gatekeepers and connecting with others as Shyam. He has taught me a lot about myself, has connected me with influential people, and offered significant helpful advice. When I reflect on the 16 months I have know him, he has taught me that momentum is key and that hard work pays off.

How They Inspired Me:

Shyam has been a great sound board for me and has the ability to listen to several ideas at a time. I see the opportunities he has created for himself from all of the networking he has done and his fearless can-do attitude. This alone has inspired me to take risks and not be afraid to pick up the phone and connect with someone new. I learned, the worst that can happen is they say no.

#NicheTip:

When Shyam was given my name and told about The Niche Movement, many people would have either brushed it aside or put it off for a day, a week, or a month. The majority of those that take the next step to reach out will often send one email. Unfortunately, it’s easy to not reply to emails so they will often get buried in inboxes. With the resources available to us and access to anyone’s digital identity, it is easier now more than ever to find a way to stand out and get noticed.  Send a note through LinkedIn, tweet at someone, find their phone number and give them a call. Be persistent and don’t be afraid of the gatekeepers because they no longer exist.

Day 21 - Putting Intentionality and Effort into Your Relationships

My 30 day blogging journey is two-thirds complete and I have been amazed at the support, words of encouragement, and most importantly, the impact that I have made so far. Thank you to all of you who have read or engaged with my posts.

Since day 21 falls on a Sunday, a day to spend time with those close to you, I am introducing my in-laws into the How I Found My Niche series.

I have been very blessed to be a part of Courtney’s family since the first day I met her. Even though I am a Yankees/Giants fan and they’re die hard Eagles/Phillies fans, they have put sports aside and treat me a like a son and a brother (most of the time ;)). My mother-in-law, Colleen, is a retired guidance counselor from Freedom High School in the Lehigh Valley area of Pennsylvania. My father-in-law, Don is an entrepreneur who ran his own accounting firm for the last forty years in the Stroudsburg, PA area. Courtney has three brothers Kyle, Brian and Mickey and they all go by the beat of their own drum (just like Courtney).

Don and Colleen, now retired in Venice, Fl, are at the opposite end of the career path spectrum but they have taught Courtney and I many lessons to help us follow our passions. As I reflect on these lessons, it always comes back to Don and Colleen “dreaming big.” Over the last 11 years, I have seen them in their professional element where their work comes natural to them.

Colleen, prior to her retiring, was a dedicated guidance counselor loved by her students and fellow educators. I have seen her truly help her students whether it be assisting the best and brightest get into the Ivy Leagues or help students with tough circumstances get what they needed to attain their high school diploma. Colleen’s resume didn’t end when she moved to Florida. In 2013, she obtained her real estate license and partnered with a successful realtor, Judy Mazrin, and the two of them are making quite a name for themselves. See, no matter the work she is doing, Colleen has the skill to care about those around her and build long-lasting relationships.

My father-in-law Don, has a remarkable story. He grew up in Pennsylvania in the post-depression era where his family came from very little. He worked very hard to attend and graduate from Temple University where he earned an accounting degree. Don doesn’t mention it often, but he also enlisted in the marines as a way to pay for his education. For a few years, he worked for an employer, but in his early thirties, he took a leap of faith and started his own accounting firm. This firm was started the old fashion way: on a napkin and with a firm handshake with his partner. Don never looked back and grew his firm to be one of the best in the Poconos. Needless to say, Courtney and I turn to him for any finance or business advice among other things of course.

Just like I have alluded to in my Day 15 and 20 posts, many people who follow their passions can get too wrapped up and not find time for friends and family. That is not the case for Don and Colleen.  Since retiring to Florida, I’m convinced they are living a busier social life than Courtney and I. Their days are filled with golf, swimming, dinners with friends, and visitors from up north (especially, between January - March). Before they retired, they led the same lifestyle and had several pockets of friends and family they would spend time with. At the end of the day, I’m sure moving to Florida may have been tough, but they had big dreams for how they wanted to spend their retirement and so they went for it. They have done this without letting any of their relationships from ‘up north’ suffer, and that takes the intentionality and effort. Something they put into all of their relationships.

Since Courtney’s parents retired, we have grown closer to my older brother-in-law Brian Stone and his fiance’ Lauren Chamberlin. We have been lucky to find time to go out to dinner with them, visit each other’s house, and get our dogs together to play every few months. Brian followed in his father’s footsteps (while making a path of his own), as he too went to Temple and now owns his own accounting firm. He has established a well-rounded business that focuses on accounting, taxes, and also the launching of new businesses all over the east coast. Brian has the perfect balance of personality, business smarts, and street smarts to provide a service that is in-demand.

When I launched The Niche Movement in February of 2013, he and his firm helped me set-up an LLC and business registration. This among other business advice he has offered to Courtney and I has been invaluable over the last year. Not to mention, above and beyond the great business advice, Brian and Lauren are A LOT of fun!

My younger brother-in-law, Kyle also graduate from Temple in 2008 with a degree in International Business (you can see why they are all die hard philly fans!). Currently, he works for a company called Victaulic, where he is a sales rep selling couplings and piping systems to mines in Australia. Two years ago he had the opportunity to go there for a job and in typical Stone fashion, he went for it. He has a perfect mix of his parent’s traits. He has the business and street smarts from Don and has the personality to connect with anyone like Colleen. At the same time though he is adventurous, laid back and doesn't take life to seriously. When you roll these traits into one, Kyle gets a skill set that has been super successful for him. We miss Kyle a whole lot, but we love any chance we get to Facetime with him and always look forward to his visits.

How They Inspired Me:

With people like my parents, grandparents, cousins, and now in-laws in my life, I have a very well rounded set of values and skills that no matter what I do with my life, I know I will be successful. Don and Colleen have inspired me to dream big and have shown me how to maintain important relationships with friends and family. Kyle has inspired me to be adventurous and to roll with the punches. Brian has taught me that with the right skills, smarts (and good accounting advice), you can make it on your own if you’re willing to put the time and energy into it.

#NicheTip:

When finding your niche, you will need to advocate for yourself and what you want or need help with. My in-laws are a perfect example of how they balance a life of doing what makes them happy while keeping relationships close to them.